In this draft, Kenny Phillips would be a Giant

kennyphillips.jpgThe folks at SportProjections.com put together a mock draft using team bloggers from all around the great Inter-Google.read more | digg story

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The Real Miami Football DyNASTY!


Patriot Fans, ignore all the hate. Hating is far more destructive negative energy than cheating is. But dont take my word for it, Im Darkside. This loss is gonna hurt forever. I have several heartbreaks that are equal to if not greater than The Patriots tonight. Things like this are usually what make you turn to the Darkside. You got Wilfork and Merriweather, thats more than enough cred to juice the Pats in.

 

Now picture this . Instead of being 18 – 0, imagine being 34 – 0. Music and Fashion have changed since you last lost a game. You are the reigning champ defending the title. During that game, you go down like 17 – 0. Then Moss gets his leg folded the wrong way until everything snaps. Then you fight back and tie the game and force 2 overtimes, and the game is finally decided on a bad pass interference call.

 

Can you imagine that pain for a second? 34 – 0. Undefeated Coaching record, defending title, overtime, and you get a flag…4 full seconds after you have been declared the winner. Count 4 Mississippi. Fireworks were going off!

 

A pathetic lettuce farmer from Oklahoma stole The Miami Hurricanes National Title and gave it to Thee Ohio State that night in Arizona. There has never been a worse call in the history of televised championships. Never. Nothing even close.

In closing, yeah it sucks to lose a championship, but its even worse to have it stolen away.

Fiesta Bowl Update

U-RB Willis McGahee recovered from the devastating knee injury was drafted in the first round of the 2003 NFL DRAFT. While playing for the Ravens this season he ran all over the Patriots. He was stopped short on 3rd down by NT Vince Wilfork, which ultimately got the ball back for the Patriots.

Buckeye RB Maurice Clarrett is currently serving time in a prison somewhere in Ohio.

SS Sean Taylor is dead. He was murdered in his bedroom protecting his wife and child. 

 

 

 

Sports dont need screenplays!

oransebowl.jpgMost Sports movies suck, you have exceptions, like Rocky, Jaws, Bad News Bears, Raging Bull, Rudy and Hoosiers but those come too few and far in between. Why do I need a writer to write a movie when real sports have mega-drama that no script can match. This
weekend alone, I watched local highschool on television win a state
title, a local highschool win a national championship 41 – 0, watched
Wisconsin Upset Apollo Creed-like Mount Union for the Div3 title. Then
I watched my Dolphins win their first game of the season in overtime
with a bunch of scrubs nobody has ever heard of.
Factor in the subplots. Local rich highschool got robbed of a title at the
goaline on the last play of the state championship last year. Computer
models have proved we won last year, the ball got in the endzone. Oh
well this year the boys won it decisively.

Miami Northwestern won the mythical High School National Championship
last night in Orlando. NW is all Black. Yup even the kicker and
punter. They have 30 kids on the team that are getting Div1
scholarships to play football. 8 or 9 of them are gonna go to the U.
Thats a movie, but why remake? Oh yeah thats what Hollywood does.
Earlier this season, Miami Northwestern flew to Texas
to play legendary South Lake Carol. SLC is a rich kids school, its a
high school and they have their own 50,000 seat stadium, indoor
practice facility, all the bling. And they win alot. You know how it
goes, The Miami Northwestern kids have braids and dreadlocks and gold
teeth, the South Lake Texas kids look the oposite. The Yin Yang, the
Tiger vs the Dragon. Miami Northwestern wonned.

What else? I got Frank Gore to look out for, and Willis McGahee. Tonight the
Redskins played the Giants so its like a Canes reunion with Shockey,
Santana Moss, Sinorice Moss, Rocky Mcintosh, Clinton Portis, Jeff
Feagles…but no Sean Taylor. Its all one Giant drama. Sure there are
stories to tell, and they can be told. But storys are just storys,
they arent sports. You dont need to write Rocky. He fights every
weekend if you know where to look.

Sylvester Stallone – The U

Sean Taylor Murdered

Devin Hester is the master of returns. But even he cant return Sean Taylor. Is that a sick joke? I cant even tell. Its a defense mechanism that takes over when my pain and anger redline. I got too many questions and no answers.

The media is gonna shape the story into a storyline. Thats their job. Im not gonna pretend that I have known Sean Taylor the man. All I know is the football player. As fanatics we learn who these kids are. High school football is an industry in Dade and Broward county. Its no secret that just about all of college football wants Florida high school ballers on their rosters, NFL too. Some of these kids are bonafide stars while they are in high school.

Sean Taylor was a phenom at Guliver Prep school, an ultra-exclusive private school. It was a big deal when he signed to play for the Canes. From the moment he took his first step onto a football field as a Cane he gave fans the genuine feeling that Superman had arrived, and was here to save the day. The first thing you noticed about Sean on the field was that he was bigger and faster than anybody else out there. It was that obvious. Your eye didnt have to wander too long to find Sean Taylor.

Sean helped the Canes win back to back2back National Titles in 2001 and 2002. A half blind lettuce farmer from Oklahoma stole the 2002 National Championship and gave it to Maurice Clarret, another national superstar high school football phenom. During regulation Sean Taylor intercepted a Buckeye pass, and while returning it, Clarret grabbed for the football. FREEZE action.

Taylor and Clarret are locked up. there are four arms wrapped around the football. This is the greatest champion game in the modern cable era.

SOUND FX (heartbeat) Sound

Action resumes, and Clarret rips the ball away from Sean Taylor recovering it for the Buckeyes. Last week we all thought Maurice Clarret was the biggest loser to have played in that game. Everybody else that started the Fixedesta Bowl went to the NFL. Everybody.

The biggest loser was Sean Taylor. He’s lost his life. Clarret is still with us. And thats the ultimate lesson here. The 2002 National Championship aint really that big of a deal when you really think about. So what if that stupid lettuce farmer’s four second late flag ruined a 34 game winning streak, an undefeated coaching record, and a title defense. Things can be worse, like lying in bed with your woman and somebody breaks in your house and try to shoot your penis, but misses and hits femoral artery and you bleed out.

Got it? Make each day count. If you think everthing sucks, and you are hurting or down and out, maybe you are a Dolphins fan, whatever it is. Its not as bad as being dead. When you are as low as you can get. Toredown. Level with the ground. Do what your Great Uncle Mike Irvin the Hall of Famer said to do.

Look Up, Get Up, and Dont Ever Give Up.

Sean Taylor we miss U.

What Happened to College Football in 2007?

Lets go back to the begining of the year, USC was hemoraging talent because it had too much. You blink, and some team called South Florida is screaming they are gonna win the National Title. The Miami Hurricanes suck, Notre Dame really sucks, Michigan loses to a div1aa school. Some team from Oregone starts yelling ring sizes. Ohio State gets Zooked. LSU gets Nuttered. Florida v Florida state is impotent.

What happened? Who ruined college football? Comments welcome.

AJ FEELY PUNKS DOLPHINS

Probably the lowest TV moment in NFL history was when AJ Feely was clutching his injured butt cheek while was an unmemorable Dolphins QB. But like Culpepper, and Wes Welker, AJ Feely got to rub it in the Dolphin’s face. The sore-assed QB that Miami gave up on came into the game when Donavan MCNabb sprained the the GCL and GLL of his Chin Goiter.

Feely didnt do much. He threw a pick, but when the clock hit zero, Feely was the one with a smile on his face. The Dolphins won the turnover battle 3 – 0, and they even scored a special teams TD, yet they still lost. This maybe the worst team ever.

SLEPT ON PERFORMANCE – Antrell Rolle of the Cardinals picked off two interceptions and returned them both for TDs. Roscoe Parrish had a long ball TD.

In conclusion, all my teams suck. The Canes are pathetic, the Dolphins are worse than that. What was once a proud football town is now frowning in shame. Throw a rope?

IRON ASS FOOTBALL TIME

Another week of football is gone, but there is light at the end of the tunnel. The holidays are here and we are gonna be watching some serious bonus football. The games on Thanksgiving are our right! Don’t let evil family layer guilt when it is your fucking birth right to watch Thanksgiving Cowgirls and Detroit Eminems back to back. Fight for your right to eat and watch football. You can even scratch your balls. Anyone that disagrees wants us to lose the war on terror.

Next. The Patriots? Whats to say, everyone else will say it and probably say it better. The story of the day is Kevin Everrett. Madden Night Football opened with Kevin Everrett delivering a video greeting on the Trons. It was powerful and chilling. Dude broke his neck and he’s already shopping for groceries with a cart. Miracles happen. We all prayed for Kevin Everrett and now hes walking. Its all about this U, man!